00:00:00 - Blaine Oelkers
Very excited when I realized why God put me on the plan. Now, not everybody figures that out, but I did. And it's to help people take control of their lives by taking control of themselves, something I call personal implementation. And so I started a company in 2009, and that's all I've been doing since. And I love it, and I'm going to do it no matter what.

00:00:19 - Jerry Dugan
Do you feel like you're stuck in a rut in life or in a dead end job with no progression? I'm Jerry Dugan, and welcome to beyond the Rut, the podcast that offers you the motivation, inspiration and practical tools to help you build a life worth living. My show is here to help you break free from your limitations and find a path to success. Join me as I share encouraging stories and actionable advice on how to get out of your rut in life and create a vision for your future. Life is just too short to live stuck in a rut. Here we go. Hey, rudder nation. This is Jerry, and in this episode, our special guest is TEDx speaker and consultant and coach Blaine Oelkers. Now, Blaine's topic on Ted was what you think about you bring about Watiba if you wanted to make an acronym out of it. So we're going to talk about mindset and what we pour into our minds, what we take in and consume as far as media does help shape how we see and perceive the world around us. So what you think about you bring about? Here we go. All right. Hey, Blaine. Thanks for joining me out of Phoenix, Arizona.

00:01:30 - Blaine Oelkers
How are you doing, Jerry? Thank you so much for having me on. I am so excited to hear with Mr. Rut Buster himself. I've been a fan. I've heard you on a lot of podcasts, and I'm happy to be here and maybe help somebody bust a rut or two. So I'm excited to be here and happy that you're having me on today.

00:01:51 - Jerry Dugan
I've been doing this for, like, almost eight years now, and I've never heard the phrase bust a rut. I am so tempted, guys, to make that the new the tagline or sorry, the immature high school kidneys coming out. Anyway, I love it because that's what we're trying to do is we're trying to get out of that rut. We're not trying to live stuck in life anymore and just live it to the fullest in our faith, family, fitness, finances and our future. So I love that phrase.

00:02:18 - Blaine Oelkers
I mean, I like it, and it makes me think of that Ghostbuster song where that song where he goes, busted makes me feel good. We probably should not be singing on this podcast, but too late. That's what it reminded me of.

00:02:29 - Jerry Dugan
I finally saw Ghostbusters Afterlife, so that themed song is in my head right now. I love that this conversation was meant to be. Now, you did a TEDx Talk, a few years back and it helps folks kind of like hack their head trash in a sense. So there's kind of like, what would Jesus do? The bracelet from the 90s. But you have YTA, y BA. And I'm sure I butchered how you say it, but it essentially stands for what you think about, you bring about. Tell us how that came about and kind of the concepts within that kind of unpack that for us.

00:03:07 - Blaine Oelkers
So it kind of sounds like a circus tiger's name whiteeva, but it stands for what you think about, you bring about. And so for me, I've always been maybe like the listeners, I've always been a seeker. How can I do better? What knowledge can I amass? Wisdom is probably the thing I want the most out of anything. And I was lucky because I had a couple of moments of dawning comprehension where the light bulb goes off and you're never quite the same. And so the first one of those for me happened in college. So this is kind of way back, but I went to Purdue University and I was at Purdue and I saw this ad and it was for an audio cassette. So boom dated myself. This is back in the 80s, so some of you might have to go look up on Google. What's an audio cassette anyway? It's a little thing that send you in the mail and plays in a little Sony Walkman player. But I sent away for this audio tape of the reading of a condensed version of this book called Think and Grow Rich. Now, actually, it turned out it was read by Earl Nightingale, who has turned out to be one of my mentors later on, but in this book. So I listened to this tape, then I bought the book, read the book, and in college I realized that what you think about, you bring about, and that your dominant thoughts. And now science kind of has all these brain reasons why it happens, but your dominant thought begins to find the things that help you get what you want if you take action now. So it's not kind of there's this thing called the Law of Attraction where you just think it and it happens. But for me, yteba, what you think about, you bring about. There are steps you have to take, you have to follow the breadcrumb, so to say. But I had that AHA moment, that moment of dawning comprehension in college and everything changed for me. I met my wife at college. We've got 31 years of marriage now, so that went well. And success really came about from me kind of taking control of my thinking and and realizing this this, ytaba, and so later in life I did use it. I talk in this in the TEDx Talk About, Ytaba as like my big idea worth sharing, because if you get a hold of it, it can be very powerful in your life one, to chart the course, but two, to catch yourself if you're going down the wrong course. So I've used it in both scenarios, but it's become very powerful, and I like how brain science is, like, catching up and finally kind of showing us why it works and how it works. And I talk in the TEDx talk, it's like a garden, though. Your mind is like a garden. So if you plant nothing, then the weeds are going to grow, and you probably have to pull the weeds later, or someone else will plant something in your mind. But you have to kind of take control of that. You have to take control of what you think about on a daily basis to really kind of have the garden that you want.

00:06:01 - Jerry Dugan
The whole field of positive psychology is really founded on that, and all their findings are proving the thing. You're saying if you choose happiness, that's where you're going to find success. That's where you're going to see opportunity. It shapes your perspective, how you see things that if I'm being hopeful, if I'm thinking about things that can be, then I'm just on many levels thinking about, how do I make this happen? How do I look for those opportunities? How do I recognize those opportunities? How do I connect with the right people and build and nurture the right connections to bridge all these gaps? Have you read the happiness advantage by Sean ACOR?

00:06:43 - Blaine Oelkers
Oh, come on. Sean Acre. He's one of my favorite guys. Now, if you want to talk about if you want to see a masterful mine's, okay. I did a TEDx talk, but Sean did this one talk. It's only about 14 minutes, 1214 minutes long, all about the happiness advantage and rewiring your brain. And so I've used that talk in a number of presentations, and I've actually run these challenges where we literally, in less than 30 days, we physically rewire our brain for happiness and for success. And so if the audience, if you guys are looking for one quick tip on the rewiring, is simply do this once a day. You could do it in the morning if you want, or at night. Think back over the last 24 hours and recall three good or great things that happened to you. It can be things you're grateful for, but it's better if it's like, something specifically good that happened in your day in the last 24 hours, right? And by doing that and if you want to journal it, that's even better. But by doing that, you actually wire your brain to look for the positive and to look for the opportunities. And so over 21 days, if you do it for 21 days, what happens is the neurons of your brain start to wire to look for that. If you do it for 63 days, then this thing called myelation, this insulation goes around those nerve endings so that now it's on something that's very hard to break, and you literally can rewire your brain. And if you're always having trouble and you say, well, I'm a negative person, or life, you feel like a victim all the time. That's one technique. We could deep dive into some others, but that's one technique that you can literally begin to rewire your brain. So cool, so important. It's not always easy to do, but it's getting simpler to do. It's a simple thing. Just three good things from the last 24 hours.

00:08:46 - Jerry Dugan
Yes, I love that, because it really is what you're saying. What you think about, you bring about. And I often think about a work trip I did where it was myself and a coworker. We had to fly up to a certain town. We did our mission. I'm thinking army right now. But we did our task. We had different tasks, but we also happened to be on the same flight going back to Corpus Christi, and the flight got canceled because there was a thunderstorm. It lasted too long. Flights were getting canceled left and right. And so that's it. Options were you can rent a car and drive through the storm. Good luck. It'll take you about eight to 10 hours. It's already 10:00 at night. Or you just go ahead and get a room for the night and sleep it out, come back the next day and take an early flight home. And so that's what we both opted to do. We got our own hotel rooms. We had transportation. It was the same hotel. We got the same flight the next morning. Everything was handled. Everything was paid for. And I'm going through this experience, and I'm calling home, and I sound excited. I'm like, yeah, bummed that I got delayed. Like. Hey, Liv. Flight got canceled. Looks like I'm staying the night at the hotel. Shuttle's on its way to pick me up. I've got all my stuff. It looks like I'm already on the next flight out at, like, 630 in the morning, so I'll see you before you wake up. She's like, okay. Awesome. Great. And my mindset was, I've got a hotel room my company is paying for. I got transportation the the hotel is paying for because they're picking me up with the shuttle. So I've got roof over my head, warm place beds. I got breakfast in the morning paid for by my company, and I got a flight home, and I'll be home before anybody else is awake at home, and I get to go into work a couple of hours late because of this whole delay. Awesome. My coworker was the complete opposite. Same situation, same resolution, completely different outlook on the whole thing. And her take was like, oh, this always happens when I travel. I can't believe I got to stay one more night in a hotel. I mean, shuttle service, I got to get up early in the morning and eat a hurried breakfast. I got things to do tomorrow. We had the same things to do tomorrow. So it was just like I remember looking at her thinking, we're going through the same exact thing, but I'm okay with it. And she's acting like the whole world has just come apart and that she's the victim in all this. And it was just that AHA moment that it's what we're thinking about. Not just about the world around us, but kind of ourselves, too. I was like, hey, I'm blessed. I'm taken care of. And she was like, this always happens to me, and life is never fair. And I thought, wow, okay.

00:11:28 - Blaine Oelkers
You uncovered one of the greatest secrets of all time in that, and I call it the lens of the future. And so literally, the lens of the future, the way you look through into the future literally dictates what happens to you. And you both had two different lenses. I often tell the story about if I told you in the beginning of the day, and I said, Jerry, I'm really sorry, but for some reason, I just got this premonition that today is going to be one of the worst days of your life. And then you're almost hit by a car as you're crossing the street, and you go, oh, gosh, Blaine was right. This is the worst day. And you're going to be scared and frightened, like, physically. You're going to be shaking and scared and scared the rest of the day, and shy and withdrawn, and your physiology is going to match that. And your feelings and your brain chemistry is going to match that. Now, same day, same morning. And I hand you a different lens of the future, and I say, Jerry, I don't know why, but like, today is going to be one of the best days of your life. Same thing. You're crossing the street, you're almost hit by the car. Now, initially, you'll be a little shocked by that, but then you go, plain was right. My life is spared. God has a reason for me to be here. And you're excited and you're open and you're energized. Totally different brain chemistry, totally different life, right? And it's all determined simply by that lens of the future. And so what I did a number of years ago, I realized how important that was. And I created a habit of taking a mind shower. Now, people take a physical shower every day, but I actually take a mind shower first thing in the morning. We could talk about setting up new habits, but I do that every single morning. I take this mind shower. Now, if I don't have a lot of time, I'll do a three minute mind shower. I prefer a ten minute mind shower. And there's meditation apps you could use to help you to kind of clear your mind and then focus on what it is you want. So sometimes there's an app called Headspace. There's another one called Calm which is good insight. Timer is another cool one. And then one I like from a Christian standpoint is called Abide. And Abide is just this great Christian meditation app. In any case, I am cleaning that lens and I am setting that lens every day. And that stuff shows up based on the lens. Yeah, well, and the thing about it is you realize then that you do create your reality. Now, you don't create your circumstances, right? It's not what happens to you that determines your life outcome. It's what you do about what happens that's my favorite mentor is Jim Rohn. That's a quote from him. So it's how you respond to life that creates your future, your destiny, not the circumstances.

00:14:13 - Jerry Dugan
Oh, yeah. And you see that with anybody who's gone through any kind of traumatic experience or any kind of hardship. Statistically. There are those who take up high risk coping mechanisms, like drinking, that is, alcohol abuse, drug abuse, promiscuous, sex, daredevil type of tendencies, self harm, those kinds of things. And then you have those who come out of it and you'll ask them, how did you do that? And they'll just kind of like almost nonchalantly. You want to smack them upside the head. Kind of say, I just choose to make the best of it. And I'm saying that because I get that a lot. Like, oh, how come you're so happy? I used to get picked on at work because I would be so chipper on a Monday morning. And they're like, you cannot be that happy. I'm like what? Yeah, why not? And they're like, Come on, it's just a hard time. The company's doing layoffs, the economy sucks, it's a hot day outside. And I'm like, yeah. And I woke up. How simple is that, though, from what we're talking about, somebody who is kind of pessimistic woe is me. They don't have to stay like that. That's not like a permanent temperament.

00:15:31 - Blaine Oelkers
Yeah, 100%. And Jerome often says, if you don't like where you are, move, you're not a tree. Right? So we can change, we can grow. And I put this under the umbrella of what I call hacking your head trash. And so we all have a certain amount of head trash. Now. I do the mind shower every morning, so I'm kind of clearing out the head trash kind of in a proactive way. But there's a couple of things. There's proactive ways to do it, long term solutions, and then there's in the moment solutions. And so my favorite so I'll start with the in the moment and then we'll talk about the longer term. My favorite one in the moment where you can kind of flip your brain back to helping you instead of hurting you. Because remember we talked about white table. What you think about you bring about this thing called the reticular activating system is the back part of your brain that decides what goes from the kind of the subconscious mind where all the inputs and all the data is and everything you hear and see and feel and touch, and it's all in that subconscious. It decides what to push into the conscious mind. Right. And so if you're thinking that you're the victim and this is a bad thing, then your mind's going to find data points to support that bad thing, and you're going down the cliff really fast. And so the way you turn that around is very simple is two words. Yeah, but you do this thing called yeah, butting yourself. Now you can also yeah, but other people so whenever I find myself, like, saying I just don't have enough time. Yeah, bud. And then you pause and you let your brain your brain has to help you. It's like Google, it can't help but answer the question. Right? I never have enough time. Yeah, but I control my schedule. Yeah, but I could stay up an hour earlier. Yeah, but I could get up an hour earlier. Yeah, but I could hire someone. Yeah, but I could delegate. Yeah, but I could work on the 20% that produces 80% of the results and oust the 80 and focus on the 20 and you start to get all these answers. So I have a lot of fun. Yeah, budding. Other people as well as myself. And when I have that limiting belief come, I just yeah, but it and that's an immediate your brain tries to get you to the other side, right? So whenever you have something that you want to change, now if you don't want to change, that's your choice. You're a human being. You get that choice. And if someone doesn't have the ambition to change, it's hard to do anything for them. But once you decide that you want to start to change, then you can begin to yeah, but those, those limiting beliefs and and the problem is when you argue for your limitations, you get to keep them. So I hear people saying, I'm too old, I'm too this, I'm too that, and it's like, yeah, you're always going to stay that way. Right. Henry Ford whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right. So it starts with the belief and the belief in yourself. And the belief is not there. You're not going to do anything but the yeah, but that's the quick head trash turnaround is the yeah, but does that make sense?

00:18:31 - Jerry Dugan
Oh, yes, totally. It's reminded me of a past guest I had on here who said, if we could just remove the knots in our lives, I'm not young enough, I'm not smart enough. And when you remove those knots that are tying you up in those limiting beliefs, now you've got, I am young enough, I am smart enough. And you start to speak that into yourself very similarly. Like, you've got this limiting belief. Yeah, it's there, but boom, here's my counter to it.

00:19:00 - Blaine Oelkers
Yeah, buddy. Or your brain start to do it. And if you're really struggling, get someone you trust and let them start to fill it in. Like I've gotten so good at that. Someone can say something and go, yeah, but and then my brain just like floods in. 20 Ideas to Counterbalance that limiting Belief so have some fun with that and it works quickly.

00:19:25 - Jerry Dugan
Yes, I've also learned like the improv yes and yes, that's true and boom. Or yes, you're acknowledging that and here's the opposite and here's also this and start that snowball rolling because sometimes people will reply to a butt with another, but however for others and might work as well. I love that.

00:19:46 - Blaine Oelkers
Yeah, that's in the moment solution. Now, longer term, I like this saying the solution to pollution is dilution. So the solution to pollution is dilution. You think back in chemistry class where you had the beaker of the dark liquid and as you poured the clear liquid in, it would get clearer and clearer and clearer. Now, if you could pour enough clear liquid in, the darkness would go away, right? And so Proactively, you've got to pour in the positive. And it depends on who you are. And people do have a disposition, so there are people that are naturally happy. I tend to be one of those. But the naturally happy people don't have to pour as much in. So if I have a bad victim hour, maybe I only need 1 hour of Jim Roan to bring me back right? Now, back when I was younger, I might need 5 hours of Jim Roan to counterbalance, to dilute down 1 hour of a victim pity party. I'm not this, I'm not that. But you have the control. What you think about, you bring about to pour in the positive. So look for ways that you can pour in the positive. I like audio programs, but hanging around the right people listening to this podcast about getting out of Ruts is a great one. But all the inputs to your body can be positive or more positive than they are and pour in the positive. You know, foods you eat that are energizing, that are really good for you, all those things, the people you hang around with, that's another input. What are they having you watch and read and do, right? So really start to pour in. But the one that you can take control of, the most typically is audio programs, podcasts, and start to pour those in, especially if you're exercising or you're in the car or you're doing chores around the house, wherever you are, begin to pour the positive. And that's kind of the longer term solution to turn yourself around because if you're reading a great book, you get inspired, right? So keep pouring that stuff in. It's more like a diet. It's not a one time quick fix, but it's something you got to kind of keep pouring in like food.

00:21:49 - Jerry Dugan
Yeah, it's almost like clean eating.

00:21:51 - Blaine Oelkers
Yes, the mind meal. I take a 15 minutes Mind Meal every day, and it's great. I have a Facebook group where we do these 30 day challenges, and the people that do the Mind Meal, they post what they ate during their Mind Meal. So it could be a podcast. Recently, for the last couple of days, I've been doing a lot of peloton meditations, reading different good books. But anyway, yeah, those Mind Meals make a big difference.

00:22:17 - Jerry Dugan
It's so true, too. I mean, I remember this is many years ago, one of the presidential elections, and I just remember being mad all the time. Like, I'd get to work mad, I'd get home mad. And my wife was like, what's going on with you? You're mad? And it's not like you're working on things around the house, which usually make you mad. You're just mad. I'm like, I don't know. And she's like, well, figure it out. Pray about it, figure it out, but don't bring that in here anymore. And I'm like, Good point. Right? So I'm driving to work, and I'm realizing it's a hoopdy that I'm driving, and I only have a radio that gets me one station. I don't know why. It only gives me Am radio, no FM, and I can only tune in one station. And I realized it's political talk radio.

00:23:05 - Blaine Oelkers
There you go.

00:23:06 - Jerry Dugan
And all they do is bash the other side. It doesn't matter what side it's on, but they're just bashing ideologies. They're bashing people. They're making fun of people. So I get home or I get to work, already mad for people I don't even care about. And I realized, okay, something's got to change. It's my listening situation here. And I'm putting it on just to kind of fill the silence. What if we just had something else? And so what we wound up doing was we got, like, a little it was a hoopdy. So we got a portable speaker, put it in the car, plugged my cell phone into it, and I would just play podcasts instead. And I just got to work happier, had a better day about it, got home happier, and my wife's like, all we needed was, like, a $15 set of speakers. I'm like, yeah, who knew?

00:23:54 - Blaine Oelkers
100%, you are what you eat. And that goes for the brain, too. That goes for the mind as well, right? And so that one change. See, that one little pivot may have changed the destiny of your whole life, because you end up listening to podcasts, getting into podcasts, being a podcast host, having this show is one of the top 2% of all podcasts. So anyway, well done. But yes, those small this guy Dan Kenny often said, small hinges swing big doors. And that was one of those small hinges that you make that change. And there's so many places in your life that you can make those little changes that then set you down a new course that dramatically change your life. So great job and a great solution.

00:24:36 - Jerry Dugan
And it was very necessary because I was at the time working at a battered women's shelter, already seeing some of the worst things that could happen to people. And I'm feeding this other thing into my head that just made me even more mad at the world around me and it just wasn't good for me. So that shift really happened in a way that allowed me to handle seeing the work. I was more of a community educator, but based inside the shelter. So I got to see, sadly, the women who were victims and the children they had to bring with them. And just how do you cope with that? Well, you stop feeding political radio, for sure. That's really good prescription, I'd say, and start putting some more positive things into your repertoire, things that just grow your skill sets, things that grow your mindset. So I love that so much.

00:25:30 - Blaine Oelkers
Guard your thoughts, right? Guard the people you hang around with, the shows you watch, all that stuff. Guard that because it's all having an impact. And many times people will see a big change from some people talk about fasting on the eating side, but people that do, say, a news media fast or a social media fast, give up those things for whatever period you can. Some people are so attached to it. Like just giving it up for 1 hour is a fast, right? But give it up and then try to make that fasting time just a little bit bigger and a little bit bigger. I often tell people that airplane mode on your phone is not just for the airplane. Like you can use that at other times. So if I'm doing what I call single tasking work, important work, I'll put my phone in airplane mode. And now no rings, dings, or bings. And you can really stay conscious and focused on what you're doing.

00:26:27 - Jerry Dugan
I need to do that. There we go. Not right now.

00:26:30 - Blaine Oelkers
But it's funny, I used to do that for like an hour, right? And then one day I forgot. Like, I forgot I turned it off and I got so much done. I had this super productive day. It was like five, 6 hours later, I go, oh, my phone's still on airplane mode. I turned it back on and it did light up like a Christmas tree. But it took me less than 30 minutes to triage all the stuff that had come in from the day. Some people solved their own problems and it saved me so much time, right? So much time. So just realize that the world is always going to be there. The rings, the dings, the things, they're always going to be there. But you've got to take some time for yourself. Make sure your agenda is moving forward, making sure that you're doing the most important stuff. In your life. It's interesting. I studied people from a productivity standpoint, but then at the end of life, it was interesting. What did people say at the end of their life? And they all said the same thing I wish I had more memorable moments with the people that they loved right now. The people they loved. Sometimes that's family, it could be coworkers, but more memorable moments with the people you love. That was the juice of life at the end. It wasn't, I wish I worked more. I wish I had more in the 401. It wasn't any of that. It was that now, sometimes a secondary one was that they said, I wish I had more impact with what I learned. So I wish I would have written that book or or started a podcast or whatever had more impact on what they had learned, but primarily memorable moments with the people you love. And if there's something I could do with our family, I would just scrap my plans. And I never regretted family time or doing something unique with friends. So, anyway, keep that in mind. Yeah.

00:28:16 - Jerry Dugan
Nobody really goes out saying, man, I really loved working 70 hours a week for that promotion.

00:28:21 - Blaine Oelkers
Right.

00:28:21 - Jerry Dugan
Nobody. You'd start to look back thinking, oh, if I could do it all over again, man. Now, I know we're running out of time, but I want to squeeze in this idea of how you could build a new habit within 21 seconds. Not 21 days, but 21 seconds. Tell us about that real quick, and then we'll start feeding folks into where they can find you.

00:28:43 - Blaine Oelkers
Yeah. So something a framer. So at Self Fluence, which is a company I started in 2009, and that is all about it's kind of the power you already have to influence yourself, kind of the art and science of influencing yourself. But at Self Fluence, everything we teach, we have a couple of things that the frameworks have to be. Everything you need is within reach. So for this 20 1 second habits, you don't need a special app or you don't need any special stuff, so everything you need is within reach. You're already doing it. Might not realize that you are already a habit master, Jerry. And if you decide it's not a law, but if you decide you can master it, so that's up to you. So in talking about habits, I often ask people, I say, have you brushed your teeth in the last 24 hours? So, Jerry, have you brushed your teeth in the last 24 hours?

00:29:32 - Jerry Dugan
Yes.

00:29:33 - Blaine Oelkers
Okay. And how long have you had that habit of brushing your teeth?

00:29:37 - Jerry Dugan
Oh, man. Longer than a week. My mom ingrained it in us gosh since I was three, maybe four years ago.

00:29:48 - Blaine Oelkers
So decades. So let's get this off the table. You are already a habit master. And so I'll talk about this framework with a story. So my wife and luckily this is past tense. She used to have nearly daily migraine headaches. And so the doctor said, look, we can't figure this out. We need you to keep this headache log. Now, this is like, what did you eat? What are the triggers? What's the weather? What's the barometric pressure? I mean, this is like a detailed log. And she could keep the log for a day or two. Then she'd lose it, then she'd forget to do it. And she was really struggling with this habit. And one night, I was watching her. This is how I kind of discovered this 20 1 second habits. I was watching her brush her teeth, and I go, you know, Beth, you are like the ideal dental person. Two minutes in the morning, two minutes at night. You are the ideal toothbrusher. And so I said, look, let's do this. Take the headache log, put it underneath the toothbrush, in the toothpaste. So when you're brushing your teeth for that two minutes, you fill out the log. Now, you got four minutes a day, two in the morning, two at night, and you'll never lose the log because you know right where it is. And she went from can't do it for two, three days to 90 days in a row without missing it 90 days in a row. I mean, the smile on her face going back into the doctor's office with the completed log was fantastic. Now, she has a migraine headache maybe once every couple of months. So it's fantastic. But anyway, this is the first key. The first key to creating a new habit in 21 seconds, like she did with the headache log, is what I call habit linking. It's where you link the habit to something you're already a habit master at that requires no willpower. Now, earlier in the show, I talked about wanting to do this mind shower. Well, that night when I saw the habit linking with my wife, I thought, there's two habits I want. I want the mind shower. But more importantly, actually, for me personally, is I wanted to do this Bible app. Every single day, I wanted to do this Bible app. And so what I did is I said, okay, Blaine, habit linking, what is the first thing you do every morning without fail, no willpower required? And yes, you guessed it, it is. I opened my smartphone. Now, sometimes the alarm is going off on my smartphone, but I opened up my smartphone. So what I did is, I opened up my smartphone, I moved all the apps off the home page. I just put the Bible app and the Headspace app. Now, every time I open my phone, I say to myself, I have to do those two apps before I'm allowed to look at anything else. And this is the second key. So first key is habit linking. The second key is what's called urge surfing. So you have to have some urge that you can surf to give you the power and the drive and the desire to get that new habit done. So what happens? Why do I open my phone? First thing? I'm like, well, because my son lives in Denmark, he texts me in the middle of the night, I want to know how are my investments doing, what orders came in, what emails came in, what's happening in the world, like all this stuff I want to know. And I've got all these little circles with how many messages are waiting for me in my email and all that. And I have this big desire to want to check all that, but I surf that desire. I use the energy of that desire to push me in to get that stuff done. And today when I opened my phone, it was day, 1772 days in a row. Now I know that because the apps track it, right? Yeah. Which is also cool. But now, 1700 days in a row, this new habit was formed out of nothing in less than 21 seconds and I kept it. Now the third part. So habit linking, and there's all kinds of habits you do every day, things you do more than once a day, things you do once a day, things you do once a week that you can link to and I can share with people lists of all these habit linkable things. So that's number one. Then two is urge surfing, finding the urge to surf. And then three is leverage. The last part is you can get leverage on yourself psychologically to help you keep and maintain this new habit. Now, leverage comes in a couple of ways. One is pain and pleasure. So pleasure means give yourself a reward. Hey, if I do this new habit for a week, I'm going to buy that book I want, right? Or give yourself some kind of, I'm going to get this new toy that you want or whatever, give yourself a reward. The pain also works to say have a penalty, right? So if you don't get it done, if I don't keep this habit for the next seven days, I pay some penalty. And you can find typically a friend or spouse is happy to give you the penalty, right? So my wife will say, if you don't have that done, you have to wash the garbage cans outside. And she knows I hate to do that, right? If she really wants to make sure I get it done, she'll say you have to wash the neighbor's garbage cans on the side where if you touch his garbage cans, he's coming after you. So she knows I will get that thing done. But having some kind of penalty also works. Having some accountability to somebody else is also helpful. And then the other part of leverage is psychologically. Once you get like three or four days in a row, psychologically, you don't want to break the chain, you want to keep going, right? Now neurologically when people say 21 days to a new habit, they're kind of right at 21 day mark, the neurons are beginning to be wired and this insulation starts to go around it. But it actually takes 63 days to physically have the habit kind of wired in your brain. But the key there again, habit linking, urge surfing. And then the leverage I'll give one last example is I had someone like I'm a big fan of next day planning. Never let a day in without planning the next one. So I had this one attorney, Anne, she's like, Blaine, I'm not planning my day. I need help. I want the habit of planning my day. And I said, okay, Anne, what do you do first thing in the morning without out fail, no willpower required? She goes, I have a cup of coffee. And I said, that's perfect. Go over the now what kind of coffee machine do you have that thing that grinds the beans and smells really good? She goes, yes. I go, Great. Take a pad of paper and a pen because you need a cue, you need something to remind you and put it on top of the coffee machine. And when you go I want you to brew the coffee, smell the coffee, but you can't sip the coffee till you start the list. Now you can drink the coffee while you're making the list, but you got to start the list before you have the coffee. So there she have it, linked it, she doesn't have to remember anything, no willpower required. And then she surfs the urge to want to drink that coffee to at least start the list, right? And then I told her give yourself a reward after you do it for x number of days, right? So anyway, that is the 20 1 second habit in a nutshell.

00:36:08 - Jerry Dugan
Love that. And it makes sense because if you're going to do a new thing, it needs to take what, 20 seconds or less to really go and do it. That habit linking really does pay off. It's like you're doing something you're already now we're linking this new thing to it that makes it even easier to do. I love that.

00:36:29 - Blaine Oelkers
Yeah, no willpower you're doing that thing anyway. People you could have it linking to waking up, to getting dressed, to driving, to work, to leaving work. And then there's lots of different things that you are already a habit master. There's probably 100 things a day that you do on a daily basis, sometimes more than once a day, like brushing your teeth, that you could easily link whatever new habit you want. Positivity we talked earlier about three goods or you're brushing your teeth in the morning and night. Just think of three good things that happened to you last 24 hours. You're rewiring your brain to see the opportunities to move forward and to be more positive and find the opportunities that are there. That you normally would have missed.

00:37:09 - Jerry Dugan
I know. I wanted to make reading the Bible for me a daily thing, but I kept not reading the Bible. I'm like, oh man, it's so long and the words are so small. But I put an animated or a comic book version illustrated. There we go. That's the word illustrated Bible in the bathroom because knew I was going to be there every day.

00:37:31 - Blaine Oelkers
Have it linked.

00:37:32 - Jerry Dugan
Yeah. And right now the guys are like, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, she's putting the secret out there. Yes, I am. Guys, you're in there long enough. If you put some ring material in there that is good for you for your mental growth, spiritual growth, do that. Swap out whatever else you got in there. Leave the phone outside the bathroom as well.

00:37:51 - Blaine Oelkers
That's a great you did the 20 1 second habit right there. Habit linking it to go into the restroom. And the other key is whatever habits you do choose, if you falter, we're all human, get back on the horse ride again, but try to dial down the resistance to doing that new habit. Like I would rather you nanosize the habit and psychologically keep it going. What I mean by that is when I go into the Bible app, right? Yeah. Ten minutes in the Bible would be fantastic. But if I only have 1 minute, I'm still doing I'm going for the minute, right? I'm dialing the resistance way down to keep it going and it's a battle of the brain chemicals and if you keep the street going, you're so much more likely to feel good the rest of the day and then move forward. Whereas if you miss it, then you kind of crave in. You don't want to start again. You bash yourself. So whatever you need to do, really, it's okay to dial it way down to keep it alive.

00:38:46 - Jerry Dugan
Oh, it's huge too, because I've had so many habits that I've let fall by the wayside because I never really hardwired it like that. And keeping track though, when you have in your case over 1000 days in a row, you're like, I love that streak. I want that number to keep getting.

00:39:02 - Blaine Oelkers
Higher and I don't want to mess that streak up.

00:39:05 - Jerry Dugan
And so 1 minute is better than no minutes. I love that. Now I know that folks can see your TEDx Talk by going to Blainetx.com. So Blaine, Tedx.com, where else can folks find you if they want to learn more about you, hire you as a coach and everything else?

00:39:29 - Blaine Oelkers
Yeah, I would say just go to Blaintex.com. You can opt in, you can watch my Ted Talk, but when you opt in, you'll get an email from me. So you'll have my email address, I'll send you a couple of emails about my story and about what I do. And I write a lot of articles that I just kind of give out for free. The favorite thing I do is I run this thing called Super Results Days, and once you get on my email list, you'll hear about those. But three times a month, I run this day that's designed for you to crush your own personal to do list. It's like permission to push the world back for a day and just get reorganized, decluttered, focused and progress on you and your stuff. And each of those days has a little bit of a theme. I'm actually running one today, all about decluttering. Decluttering your mind, your body, your home, your office, your computer, your smartphone. But anyway, they have themes, but it's really about you carving out time for you. And that's when I realized I got very excited when I realized why God put me on the planet. Now, not everybody figures that out, but I did. And it's to help people take control of their lives by taking control of themselves. Something I call personal implementation. And so I started a company in 2009, and that's all I've been doing since. And I love it, and I'm going to do it no matter what. Even if last Saturday I would have won the 700 million dollar Powerball, I would still be here today recording this show with Jerry. Now, it might be crazy. I might be giving away cars and all kinds of wild stuff, but I'd still be here sharing this message of self fluence, because it's why I'm here.

00:41:02 - Jerry Dugan
Nice. Yeah, we're birds of a feather like that. I just need to win the lottery, right? Right.

00:41:07 - Blaine Oelkers
I've got my ticket for tonight. There. You only need one ticket. If God says it's time, you just buy the one ticket right now.

00:41:15 - Jerry Dugan
Any final words of wisdom before we go?

00:41:17 - Blaine Oelkers
Yeah, you know what? Here's the final words. The bad news. The bad news is time flies. The good news, you're the pilot, so pilot well, my friends, pilot well.

00:41:27 - Jerry Dugan
Awesome. Blaine, it was great to have this conversation with you, and I look forward to staying in touch with you.

00:41:33 - Blaine Oelkers
All right, looking forward to it. Take care.

00:41:35 - Jerry Dugan
Now, I had a great time talking with Blaine, not just during this recorded conversation that you just heard, but both before and after. When you stack up your day, you don't really have a whole lot of time to chitchat. However, I almost was late to my next interview, so that's just some side note behind the scenes stuff there. The important thing I want to share with you is, if you want to see Blaine's Ted Talk, learn more about him, see related episodes around mindset from beyond the Rut. Go check out the show notes@beyondtherut.com. Three, seven, one. There you'll find all that information. Also, that's the best thing to share with your friends and family is all those resources, the episode, the links out to Blaine's resources, and those related episodes on mindset. Now, I'm glad you joined me for this episode, and I look forward to joining you again on the next one. But until next time, go live life beyond the rut. Take care.